Night Owl

  I had written this on my ZenWriter last December... But I never posted it. So now, I am. ;) I was currently battling writer's block then, at the same time, myself for being nocturnal. Usually, I write things like these whenever I am itching for something to write, but don't know what exactly. It happens often. :))

   "It's that time of the day when I am most alive. It's the time when I am comfortable, as if peace suddenly dawns in me. Yet it could be a lonely and dark place. You could be all alone as shadows wallow you up, and you'd end up fading into the background. But why do I feel as if it's the only time when I am most satisfied? The sense of silence and energy makes me feel as if there are electric shocks piercing through my very bone. You see, you have these tendencies when you want to sit back, relax, and finally have that moment of rest. When you have been up all day and you can just stretch your muscles out, and soon you'll be fast asleep. Then again, there are these tendencies when you refuse to take that time to rest because you feel the need to do something. But what? Yes, that's the question. You get up from the bed, walk around, and think that you do want to do something, but what exactly? What is that thing that you want to do so badly that you'd sacrifice sleep?
   Maybe that's what the night does to us. We feel as if the day shouldn't end just yet because there is so much to do yet so little time! Time flies so fast that you somehow couldn't catch up on it! Just a day doesn't seem enough! But when will it ever be enough? We can do things, so many things, but somehow we manage to waste time and we don't even realize it. We spend time on things we think are important, yet in the end, none of that ever was, because it all went to waste. Then we ask ourselves, why do we exert so much effort? Do we have to prove ourselves badly just to get what we want? And does what we want actually gives justice to life? We want so many things, desire for so many things, but do we actually need it? And if we don't get what we want, we don't get the time we spent on it back. But we tell ourselves that at least you tried. And when things didn't go as planned, you're just going to say at least you made that mistake for you to actually know that it was a mistake. At least you got some closure.
   And yet, through all that... Life must go on.
   In through the night, and into the day, life continues to go further, leaving no one behind - even though it sometimes feel that way. But it's our choice whether to ride on that rollercoaster of life. Yet, it isn't our choice to stop either. It's either you ride that, or you go nowhere. And it's better to go somewhere, through all those ups and downs, loop de loops, round and rounds, left and rights, all of it, than to go nowhere at all. Why? Because all of us are lucky enough to be here, and we've only got one ticket to get one hell of a ride. 
   Now, look at me, and all those things I've said. I guess my mind's finally back on track, and I no longer have the writer's block. Or maybe I'm going through those emotional spirals again. Either way, it's time for bed... Why? Because all of those things above, that's what the night makes us do.
   We just overthink.
   And what good will that do us? In the end, it's better to just get some sleep."


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