My Version of Tiffany's - How Soon Is Now?

Sunday, December 13, 2015

My Version of Tiffany's

   The last month of the year has finally arrived, and as promised, I did mention that I was going to write you a long overdue personal post. So here I am! Though, I do have to say that I am quite puzzled at the moment as to where to possibly start! It's been a crazy few months - life-altering, if I do say so myself... At least, of course, for me. But it isn't anything too drastic, but a breakthrough that I'm very much glad happened.
   So as you know, I have been very busy, and the reason for that is because I finally got a job! *Cue the party pops, and the "huzzahs." I know, finally, right?! Though, I am actually working for my mother (she's my boss, I know, yikes!) at that new Japanese animation school, and it's been going pretty well. I was a bit overwhelmed at first since I was out of school for nearly three years, but the work's mundane - y'know paper works, Microsoft Excels (meh) - and it's alright for a first job. I mean, I didn't exactly expect it to be all too riveting or whatever, although it's enough to keep me busy and interested, I guess. Other than that, I've been very busy with choir practices, considering how December is finally upon us, and every year, we always have a lot on our schedules during this time. Then of course, I have been writing more now. In fact, I just managed to finish the next chapter for the Fan Fiction yesterday - I know, I didn't expect to finish it that fast! - and obviously now that'll probably go on during the holidays considering I've got more time on my hands then.
   And speaking of holidays, I couldn't be any more unprepared for this season! I haven't done my Christmas shopping, wrap gifts, and all the things that I usually get so excited about! In fact, I'm not really into the idea of giving gifts this year, which is clearly the opposite of the concept of Christmas, but instead, I want to do some retail therapy for myself. And you can call me selfish or whatever, I don't know, but now's the time when I want to have time for myself, really, just because I finally can. Although, don't fret, because I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't be able to resist anyway. It would be very strange to spend Christmas not having to comply with the concept of "giving."
   Anyway, so I haven't really been up to being social lately, to be completely honest. Sure, I crawled out of my hibernation - physically and socially - a few months ago, but now, all I want to do is crawl back in. I want nothing more than to have a break from everyone and everything, and just be in a bookstore, wandering aimlessly all by my lonesome. I'd probably read a good book, too, or write, just to regain some of my sanity and have some solitude. Usually though, as you guys know, when I do get stressed or frustrated in general, I watch an Audrey Hepburn movie. And last weekend, I did just that and watched Breakfast At Tiffany's. So basically, now that I think about it, a bookstore is actually my type of Tiffany's that Holly Golightly considers as her safe haven, because obviously, as she had said, "Nothing very bad could happen to you there [at Tiffany's]."

   Clearly, this is my version of it, "Nothing very bad could happen to you there [at FullyBooked]." 
   And the thing is, people (that I actually know, especially my family) finds it very absurd when I tell them that I just want to go there and be alone. It's as if the very thought of being alone in general is frightening. Yet as for me, it isn't exactly anything personal or something that's quite unusual. I mean, is it so strange that I am comfortable being in my own company? And is it so strange to actually want a break from all the hubbub of all the social occurrences that goes into my life? Perhaps this is my introvert personality coming out, but I just need that quiet time to recharge before I go out and assert myself again in social situations that take up most of my energy anyway. Now however, that there was much restrain that refrained me from doing so (considering my mother's incredulous reaction when I asked if I can go to FullyBooked alone), I couldn't be any more frustrated and irritable. The fact that it's so simple and so mundane, and yet I couldn't even do it, is merely vexing.
   So I've come up with a compromise, and instead, I'll probably give myself a free pass tomorrow, and do whatever I like. A break, an escape, is what I need. And basically, I'm not going to yield this time. I always happen to compromise myself and my needs from everyone's demands, and now, I just have no desire to engage myself in that kind of bullshit. This is me, coming into my own, and if I need to take a day off, then so be it.
   I actually encourage everyone to be wherever or do your version of Tiffany's, as well.
   And yes, for now, I shall leave you with that... ;)

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